Round 1: It was a back and forth battle between mom and the bugs. Day one played out like a kickboxing match. But soon It was apparent, the bugs seemed to have the upper hand. The head was infested and mom seemed like an easy knockout. After a multi nit takedown, the fight lasted till 2am where mom finally got a takedown of her own. Mom came out swinging, mayo as well as a nix head treatment and carpet/ upholstery spray (yes, the dreaded chemical’s), blow dryers and straighteners, and scored big. Mom finished strong with 14 loads of laundry being washed, and it was a 10-8 win for mom at the end of round (day) one.
Round 2: The bugs put it on mom at the beginning of day 5 with some white nits that looked like newly hatched critters. It was a slam from behind. With the pressures of last week of school projects (who are these teachers???) hitting heavy, it seemed like an easy takedown for the bugs. Mom recovered and took the battle to the sprayer giving an unauthorized head treatment (what was mom to do?) two days early and more straightening. Another 14 loads of laundry (this time till 2:30 Am) and mom was back in the fight. But after unsuccessfully stopping the infestation, the bugs lead 10-7.
Round 3: The final round is all mom. 6 days into the fight and mom came out with a front kick followed by a series of punches (aka loads and loads of conditioner and good old fashioned nit picking) that left the bugs reeling. After 3&1/2 hours of dominating (pulling the remaining louse eggs out by hand) till 1AM (yeah right they can’t lay eggs for 10 days!) and prayer, mom scored the takedown where she again moved back into position and washed an additional 14 loads of laundry. Mom then executed a vicious metal comb where she assured all legged guests had vacated the premises, and daily monkey picking thereafter. It was a close round, but mom gamely escaped. The bugs tapped out due to a crazy mom at 8PM in the 3rd (end of day 8).
Ok seriously though. The last week goes down as one of the top 5 most stressful weeks in life thus far, and I’ve had some stressful ones. We had a house fire the Sunday after Thanksgiving. Our home was terribly destroyed and we just moved back in 5 weeks ago, and I’m telling you, this last week was comparable to that one in stress. Just the meticulous, lack of sleep, overwhelmedness of it all. And it’s so shameful, like your dirty. When the reality is, you just have a 6 year old that refuses to keep her hair up, and loves to let other kids play “beauty shop” at school. UGH! So mom’s out there, when your kid comes home with little critters up in their head, I got you. Don’t worry. You will survive, and the bugs WILL DIE! Call me, I’ll go Ape momma right there with you as we inspect every strand of your kids hair while they scream, cry, and whine. But we will, OH WE WILL be VICTORIOUS!!!!